existential crisis

Becoming a Statistic

I am scattered this week. I can’t focus on writing, or really on anything. This post was supposed to go up yesterday, but I just didn’t get to it. I am feeling the crush of becoming a statistic. In 2009, the NCTE found that transgender people suffer twice the rate of unemployment as cisgender people. […]

When Snow Falls in November

It’s snowing in Allen Park, MI in November. Not a completely unheard of event, but it’s strange to see white powder on the ground while there are still some lingering dead-brown leaves on the trees.  It was snowing seven years ago on this day, too, the day my older daughter Dawn was born. I remember […]

An Unexpected Hiatus

Hey, sorry, no Writing 101 today. I just lost my job and I’m not feeling the whole writing thing right now. More tomorrow.

What Led To Me Coming Out

Okay. I promised to tell you all about what’s been going on in the last week and a half. So let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up. About ten days ago, I got the flu. It was really bad timing — not that there’s ever a good time for influenza, […]

And Now It’s Time for a Breakdown

Tuesday was not a good day. Tuesday was supposed to be a great day. The second Tuesday of every month is the one day that I most get to be my Self. I get off work early, go home to change, and head out to Ann Arbor to spend the entire evening with my support […]

Vanity, Thy Name is Ali Edwards

So the OED has declared “Selfie” the word of the year for 2013. I can definitely relate. In the past six months, I have become a selfie maniac. It’s true! Ever since I began coming out as myself I have been snapping selfies like they’re required by law. I don’t think that there was a day […]

Inevitability vs. Regret

I had a funky night last night. Call it depressive, dysphoric, whatever, it wasn’t fun. I’m better today, but still … It all got triggered by my daughter’s birthday party Saturday afternoon. She is six, and for her birthday she and seven of her school friends all went to a local salon to get their […]


I am lonely. This is something that has been bothering me for some time now. I simply don’t have someone in my life with whom I can be intimate, with whom I can share everything, with whom I can enjoy all the little things and suffer through the bad times. That used to be my ex, […]

The Transmigration of Alison Edwards

Kira Moore of Kira Moore’s Closet posted a very thoughtful response to my last post. You should all go and read it before reading any further. The truth is that as a blogger I’m a bit of a sycophant. I need readers in order to be motivated to write and I thrive when I know […]

Transgender vs. Crossdresser

During my therapy session today, Nancy (my excellent gender therapist) asked me an important question: “Where do you think the boundary is between being transgender and being a crossdresser?” It’s a fair question, and honestly it put into concrete words some funky doubts I’d been having in my own mind over the past week. Doubts […]