October 12, 2014

Still Lonely

I closed my OK Cupid account recently. It was never terribly active anyway, but I finally accepted that I probably wasn’t going to find anyone on there who wanted to be with me.

The loneliness bug has been flaring up again this week, and the idea of a relationship is fresh in my mind. OK Cupid is not the place to find “a relationship”. It’s more like a giant booty call where mildly attractive people look to hook up with other mildly attractive people.  I chatted with a few guys, some of whom apparently didn’t bother to read three lines into my profile where I said I was trans, but even the conversations that didn’t end in “Oh, I’m not into trans girls” were mostly disasters waiting to happen. Not my scene.

I’m not sure what my scene is.  I was never a barfly in any case — I don’t like to drink — and given everything else, I’m more or less relying on serendipity to eventually put me in a place where I meet the right person. Unfortunately I don’t *go* to a lot of places where I’d meet new people. I game twice a week with the same groups of people every week; I go to work where I almost exclusively interface with students; and I go out in public where I more or less try to stay invisible as I shop for groceries. Yeah, my life isn’t that glamorous. 🙂

Finding a companion is not a problem I need to be worrying about right now. But it’s lingering there in the background and when it does flare up, like it is currently, it can put a real damper on the whole day. Sigh …

No Comments

  • I’ve totally been thinking the same thing lately. Almost considered going the OK Cupid route myself, just never got around to it. I guess I’m glad I didn’t.

    There are decent, open-minded folks out there though so I’m sure that we’ll do fine, whenever the time comes. 🙂

  • And this is why I did science fiction conventions, for a while: the desire to meet someone I could click with. Start with figuring out where someone you would want to spend whole weekends with might hang out, and work from there. Or go back to working on becoming the kind of person you want to be.

    • (the “finding someone” part is way easier said than done, I know. I will continue to send GoodThoughts in your direction that you find the companionship right for you.)

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