July 1, 2014

Holy Crap, Leviticus is Scary

So, since I last checked in with you all, I have been doing what Nancy and I discussed: writing! Well, specifically, I’ve been going over all the projects I’ve never finished before and deciding which ones are worth picking back up and which ones are worth leaving in the reject bin. I’ve been revising some work of mine and doing a thing with them on Wattpad, but I’m not quite ready to officially share that one yet. Soon.

When I woke up yesterday morning, I planned on doing more with the Wattpad thing. So I got some coffee, stretched my fingers, and did my usual “browse the Internet for an hour until you get inspired” ritual. Unfortunately, it was during that ritual that the Supreme Court released their terrible, horrible, no-good decision in the Hobby Lobby case.

Twitter exploded with both outrage and joy. There was gloating. There was arguing. There was wailing and gnashing of teeth. And there were hastags galore. Seeing as how I hadn’t been inspired yet, and seeing as how I was very ticked off about the decision, I decided to jump into the cacophany of tweets about the case.

And then some inspiration hit. If Hobby Lobby could do this based on their strong Bible-based beliefs, what other Biblical proclamations might they make store policy? So I took a hashtag that supporters of the decision were using, #hobbylobbyrules, and decided to turn it on its ear. I began writing new rules that Hobby Lobby could impose on their employees, based on things it said in the Bible. For example:

Here’s the thing: I have a serious snark streak in me. And once my snarky nature flares up, it usually doesn’t burn out quickly. So I just kept writing them. Then some other people joined in. Then people started liking and sharing some of them. I was having fun and I was writing.

Ultimately, I ran out of ideas. But since I had amused myself and apparently some others as well, I decided that this was as good an excuse as any to finally use Storify, a website I’ve always liked but have never found an excuse to use. Basically, Storify let me gather all of my Hobby Lobby Rules, and the rules tweeted by others, and put them all in one readable “story”.

You can find the Storify story hereMost of the best ones come from the book of Leviticus. There is some scary shit in there.

They’re mostly in chronological order. Looking back, I can see the arc of my creative burst — the first ones aren’t great, but then I hit my stride for a bit before the idea began to fizzle out for me. Still, they were fun to write, and I hope that some of you enjoy them too.


  • The US Supreme Court renders its decisions on the basis of two criteria. One, is it Constitutional or is it not and two was anyone’s civil rights being violated or not? The US Constitution is a living document and as attitudes change so goes the Court. All the decision meant to me is that I wouldn’t work there or encourage other women to work there, It doesn’t mean I won’t shop there. Would I not encourage women because of Hobby Lobby’s religious beliefs? No! I wouldn’t encourage women to work there because they will now have to pay for their contraceptives.

  • The hobby lobby case was not about all contraceptives, it was specific to providing the morning after pill and abortions as part if the insurance, which the companies owners do not believe in, because it goes against their religous beliefs.
    As far as a company goes, they pay well above minimum wage, offer paid vacation/sick/holiday pay, and offered a very good insurance package, BEFORE it was required of them by the government.
    I know I am wasting my time and yours with these words. I realize the twitter posts were not rooted in a lot of fact and just for some snarky amusement.
    Have a blessed day.:)

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